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How One Might End Up at a BENIHANA in India

sunny 85 °F

If there was a perfect candidate for the inevitable evolution of the cell phone to become some sort of chip installed in your wrist where phone calls are made with a swipe on your forearm, I would be the one on whom to spend the advertising dollars. I habitually lose, break or misplace most handheld electronic devices. Tovah, don't worry! I'm still holding strong to your camera! But if I know my sister, I'm sure as she handed me her camera, she knew their was a solid chance she may never see it again.

I don't know what my problem is! Too much responsibility maybe? I do know the cell phone has become this crutch that you always need at your fingertips and digging to the bottom of a purse to find it every 10 minutes becomes so annoying. So I hold it... but then I forget I'm holding it and set it down somewhere..."Oh shit. Where did I put my cell phone?". This happens numerous times and then comes that idiot- am I even in my own body- moment when I realize I am actually holding the Damn thing.

Or, if your outfit allows, you put it in your front pocket because it seems like a convenient place; only to bend over and watch it fall in sllllllooooowww M O T I O N onto a marble floor. This is what happened to me one fateful day in India the morning I shattered my beautiful retina display Android cell phone screen. Apologies to all who have Skyped, What's Apped, or SnapChatted. I haven't received any for the last 2 weeks.

Woe is Me!

Woe is Me!

But what does any of this have to do with Benihana's? Is there even a Benihana's in India? And who goes to India and eats at Benihana's for Krishna's sake?! Especially a girl who despises giving money to corporate chains when there are Mom and Pop restaurants making the most delicious food at half the price and all the profits going to their pockets as opposed to corporate lobbyists or making the Aoki family any richer.

Well, there is a Benihana's in India and it is located in Delhi. I had to make a side trip to Delhi from Rishikesh before moving on to see the rest of Rajasthan because I was so desperate to get my phone fixed. Anything can be fixed in Delhi and there was an LG Service Center that specifically told me over the phone that they could repair my phone no problem for the bargain price of 4,730rupees (about $80). Of course when I arrived they gave me the Indian Head Wobble and said "not possible" "part not here" "tomorrow."

I proceeded to bitch and moan.

They raised the priced a few dollars and told me it would take at least 2 hours.

Hands on hips...I will wait.

No exaggeration in 20 minutes it was fixed!

Friends, travel can offer you some interesting situations in which choices have to be made. Studying these said choices gives you a lot of information about your tendencies, preferences, your bottom lines, how far you will and will not go, and where you draw the line.

The situation offered to me: a 6am train from Rishikesh which meant departing my Ashram at 4:30am. My colon was not ready to go that early. By the time I arrived in Delhi at noon.... it whispered gently to me. By the time I left the LG Service Center at 2pm ecstatic with a new screen... it was Screaming my head off!

The first choice offered to me: a bathroom at the service center with a 7 ft wooden ladder in front of a toilet with no toilet seat. So I guess the men just go from the side?? Only one woman working there. Not sure what choice she makes. It was filthy (what's new?) and there was a stench albeit not the most horrific stench I've smelled. If it was #1 we were talking about, I'd go for it. No big deal. But this was #2. Heeeeelll nooo! I drew my line. Rather hold it.

So squeezing my Mulha Bhanda tightly, I walk across the street because I spot a Subway sign in the distance and hope they might have a facility. No such luck. Food court with all-American KFC, Subway, Starbucks, etc.

But then, like a beacon of light across a dark choppy ocean, I saw the red and black letters spelling BENIHANA!
In case it seems I'm beating around the bush....Folks, the real reason I ended up at Benhinan's....I had to take a poo!

What I learned about myself today?
My bottom line: I need a clean pot to shit in.
Worth the overpriced cost of a stir fry and a glass of Indian Chenin Blanc any day.



Posted by Ivoriejenkins 05:09 Archived in India

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I am so thoroughly enjoying your blog. Makes me wish I would have done one the past year. You're incredible!!

by Willis

Indian Head Wobble...I just died

by Angie

Ivorie~you are hilarious. I enjoy reading your blog every time you post... this one in particular has made my day with laughter...haha Continue enjoying your journey~ Grace, Peace, and Power :)

by LaDonna

this made my day "i had to poo!" haha...poo-ing in india is one difficult challenge...i had the same problem at the mumbai airport...and there was not a behinana in sight. :( lol

by Lori

Always have wet wipes handy. You just never know!!!

by Eric

Ivorie, your a Better woman than me....... #Thatisall

by chitowncathy

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